Updated: Jan 19
It dawn on me while going a days without speaking. That we learn how to speak, read and write but never how to LISTEN.
Communication is without question the most important skill in life. But so many of us have forgotten that listening is the greatest form of communication.
Think about this, there are basically four modes of communication: Reading, writing, speaking and listening. And most of us spend two- thirds to three -fourths of our waking hours doing these four.
Of these four forms of communication, the one that represents 40 to 50 percent of our communication time is listening. The one that we seldomly do and have the least training in it. Most of us have had many years excerising in reading, writing and speaking. But no more than about 5% of us have had more than two weeks of formal listening. Thats why I am training myself on this journey of incarceration how to listen by disciplining my speech.
Most of us think we know how to listen because we are doing it all the time. But really we're listening from within our own frame of reference. If you are not aware there are levels of listening. Ignoring, Pretending, Selective, Attentive and Empathic.
Empathic listening is the most important because it is done within the reference of the other person that is tying to convey his or her account of life to you. To truly listen to some
one is to transcend your own autobiography, to get out of your own frame of thought, out of your own value system, out of your own history and judging tendencies, and to get deeply into the frame or viewpoint of another person. This is called empathic listening. Its a very very rare skill. Getting familiar with it can advance us in every area of our life. My hope in you contextualizing this content that you have learned how to LISTEN.
Mr. Alphonso Bell
Evangelist of the Essence